Thursday, August 13, 2009
Lost In Translation
I try so hard to like cooking. I really want to be a good cook. But I'm lousy at it, I can't make anything decent and the other day I actually felt rage brewing inside me when I realised I'd have to make dinner (I know, I know, I need help...any information on self help groups for people with kitchen rage would be greatly appreciated).
The thing I hate most about it is when I can't figure out what the ingredients are. This is usually because its an American recipe and we Australians have different words for different things.
Summer from Sublime Happiness (a very cute and funny blog that you should definitely check out) wrote about buying a bacon and egg biscuit from Macca's. In Australia, a biscuit is a cookie like thing, like an Oreo (an Oreo is the only cookie I can think of that American's would know). I can't imagine sticking bacon, egg and cheese in between 2 cookies so I'm thinking that a biscuit means something else over there. I've also heard in an American TV show before about sopping up gravy with biscuits and at the time I thought it sounded really disgusting.
So I asked Summer to explain what it was. She told me and it sounded yummy so I looked on the internet for recipes thinking I could try to make my own. I was going to brave the kitchen, make these biscuit things that nobody I know has ever eaten before and I was going to take lots of pictures to put on this blog so everybody would be really proud that I managed to bake such good looking and delicious biscuits. Of course by now you have probably realised that it didn't quite work out that way since I am obviously being sarcastic.
The first step in the recipe says to sift all the dry ingredients together. That doesn't sound at all hard except they don't tell you what the dry ingredients are!
Next it says to add the shortening. WTH? If we have shortening here, I have never heard of it. I don't know if we call it something else or if it is called shortening here and I've just been walking past it in the supermarket every week for my entire life, totally oblivious to its existence.
The next step is to add the buttermilk. Yes I have heard of buttermilk I'm just not sure where to get it from. Is it with the normal milk? Is this another item that has not crossed my radar?
This is just all too hard. The kitchen will not be getting a visit from me today...